| Welcome to the jungle, baby
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| You’ve been in the dungeon
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| You look cute in that three-piece suit
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| It’s a two-martini luncheon
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| It’s a man’s world and we all know
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| For it you’ve been itching
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| If you can’t stand the heat out here
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| Slip back into the kitchen
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| All that sweat and muscle tone
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| Stiffens my libido
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| Now you’re on that Nautilus, whoa
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| You’re a crazy Captain Nemo
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| Feel the burn, you powerhouse
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| Experience elation
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| One day you might stumble on
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| A cure for menstruation
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| I saw you speaking on that talk show
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| About what bastards men are
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| Cruel rapists, rip-off artists
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| All together bizarre
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| Peter Pan’s and Captain Hook’s
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| Out to get poor Wendy
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| But as for Tinkerbell
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| You must admit she was a bit unfriendly
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| Towards Wendy
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| I’m pleased you see your curves and cleavage
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| Are to your advantage
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| Your brassiere burning older sisters
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| They did not understand this
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| Your weakness is your greatest strength
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| Little girl keep breaking
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| All that crying is not lying
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| It’s just some good old-fashioned faking
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| Yes, you see the recipe
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| For happiness is easy
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| Our family and our career
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| Oh, a body should keep busy
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| And if your husband, boyfriend, children
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| Start to kick and shove you
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| Remember that Phil Donahue
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| And Alan Alda love you |