| I never thought it would happen | 
| With me and the girl from Clapham | 
| Out on a windy common | 
| That night I ain’t forgotten | 
| When she dealt out the rations | 
| With some or other passions | 
| I said you are a lady | 
| Perhaps she said I may be We moved into a basement | 
| With thoughts of our engagement | 
| We stayed in by the telly | 
| Although the room was smelly | 
| We spent our time just kissing | 
| The Railway Arms we’re missing | 
| But love had got us hooked up And all our time it took up I got a job with Stanley | 
| He said I’d come in handy | 
| And started me on Monday | 
| So I had a bath on Sunday | 
| I worked eleven hours | 
| And bought the girl some flowers | 
| She said she’d seen a doctor | 
| And nothing now could stop her | 
| I worked all through the winter | 
| The weather brass and bitter | 
| I put away a tenner | 
| Each week to make her better | 
| And when the time was ready | 
| We had to sell the telly | 
| Late evenings by the fire | 
| With little kicks inside her | 
| This morning at 4:50 | 
| I took her rather nifty | 
| Down to an incubator | 
| Where thirty minutes later | 
| She gave birth to a daughter | 
| Within a year a walker | 
| She looked just like her mother | 
| If there could be another | 
| And now she’s two years older | 
| Her mother’s with a soldier | 
| She left me when my drinking | 
| Became a proper stinging | 
| The devil came and took me From bar to street to bookie | 
| No more nights by the telly | 
| No more nights nappies smelling | 
| Alone here in the kitchen | 
| I feel there’s something missing | 
| I’d beg for some forgiveness | 
| But begging’s not my business | 
| And she won’t write a letter | 
| Although I always tell her | 
| And so it’s my assumption | 
| I’m really up the junction |